A Glimpse into Kailyn's Adoption

Thanks so much for all your support thus far.  I am realizing that many of our new friends, those that didn't travel the adoption road with us the first time, don't really know how this whole adoption process works.  In response, I thought I'd share a few things about Kailyn's adoption to give you an glimpse. 

Let me say first though that the Jacob Chen video I posted in a previous post is very close to how it happened for us.  So -- if you haven't watched it yet, check it out.  It will make your heart happy. 

So, Kailyn's adoption.   I must give you a heads up -- this is partly mine and Josh's story and experience but it is also Kailyn's story.  There are many details that we don't share about her adoption because we feel that when she is old enough and starts asking her own questions, that she should be the first to know the answers.  She then can share her story with whoever she wants.  We want to respect her story and her history.  With that said, you can always ask but we may choose not to answer -- our choosing not to answer is not meant to be offensive, simply respecting our daughter. 

For our first adoption, we chose to register and complete a domestic private adoption with Bethany Christian Services in Grand Rapids, MI.  They are a large agency with a number of different services.  In March 2008 we began exploring adoption.  We soon were matched with a social worker or adoption practitioner to begin the homestudy process.  It was much the same as we are experiencing here.  Lots of questions, interviews, reference checks, finance checks, and home visits.  We were approved for adoption in the summer of 2008 (the summer we spent in Wallaceburg!).  This was a big deal for us -- it was exciting to finally be able to share that we were "pregnant on paper".  Of course, we knew it might be a long road until we held our own child but it was a step in the process.  During that summer, I painstakingly created a family profile.  This was the document that potential birthparents would be perusing as they decided on a family to raise their child.  A daunting task on both ends. 

When we returned to Michigan that September we often received emails from our social worker with mini profiles of birth moms who were interested in looking at our profile.  We prayed about each one and almost always said yes (there were lots of criteria on both ends to consider).  This meant that the birth mom had the option of choosing us.  This happened numerous times from September until May.  This was a long and difficult road as we waited and waited and waited.  Another Christmas passed childless as did my birthday, baby showers for other women, births of other people's babies, baptisms for other families and Mother's Day.  We wondered why God was making us wait so long.  But then the day came ... (pause, tears as I remember with joy the phone message!)

A message from our social worker that, in a nutshell, said, "Clear your schedule for tomorrow because you are bringing home your daughter."  WHAT?!  A daughter.  I am a mom. Thank you God!  

That night was a blur ... phone calls to our parents to tell them they were grandparents to a beautiful baby girl (we knew she would be gorgeous -- she was our child after all!), shopping (we really had only a playpen, no clothes, no diapers, no wipes, nothing! it was a good shopping trip) and sleeplessness!!  Tomorrow we would meet our daughter ... and her birth mom.  What joy and trepidation as we tried to prepare.  How do you prepare mentally, spiritually and emotionally to meet a a woman who is giving you a priceless gift and to meet the baby you've been praying and preparing for?  I don't know that answer. 

Finally we were given the go ahead to head to the hospital to meet our daughter and the rest is history!!  There were many more steps to complete the process but they all seemed so minor after holding Kailyn that first time.  

Four years later I still tear up at the memory of meeting her the first time.  She was, and still is, beautiful.  She is my daughter.
  

Our first family picture.