ADOPT Event Reflections

Yesterday Josh and I had the opportunity to attend an ADOPT event in London.  It was similar to the A.R.E. that is held in Toronto twice yearly.  A.R.E. stands for Adoption Resource Exchange.  These events are for families who are looking to adopt a child and for the various Children's Aid Societies in Ontario to present the children they have available.  The children range in age from infants to teenagers some with disabilities and all without forever families. 

The ADOPT event that we attended yesterday was a regional A.R.E.  When we arrived, we registered and went to a room where they had short videos of most of the children.  The videos provided basic information about the child -- name, age, interests and what kind of family they would like to be in.  They often provided information about their academic success thus far and their personality.  There were about thirty children being profiled so it took a while to watch all the videos.  Upstairs they had social workers from the different agencies ready to answer questions and provide more information if necessary.  It was a well organized event. 

My feelings about attending are all over the place.  We've really been praying that God would keep our eyes and hearts open to whatever child he has planned for us.  We don't know who that child is or what his/her needs are at this point but we don't want to miss the boat.  I was excited to go yesterday and part of me wondered if I would feel some sort of instant connection with a child in a video or on one of the handouts.  I wondered if perhaps we would go home, contact our practitioner and get the show on the road.  I wondered if I would meet my child (or at least see a picture of him/her).  

None of these things happened for me.  So, now I am left wondering again ... am I praying the right prayer? Am I desiring the right thing (a baby as opposed to an older child)?  Am I being selfish or over-protective of my family as it is right now?  These are questions that I never thought I'd ask of myself or of God.

I hope that every child that was presented yesterday is able to belong to a forever family soon, really soon.  My heart aches for all the things they have had to experience in their short lives and their innate beauty and desire to belong.  My heart weeps for these children.   Maybe your heart does too ... maybe you are in a position to do something for one of these precious little ones. 

I wanted that family to be mine but the answer, at least for right now, is no.  Just wait.  Wait.
 
Waiting, 

April